Connections

I have been thinking a lot lately about how the little things in life that people do help me feel connected to them, and my love just increases for them!

For example, a few weeks ago, my niece was giving me a good-bye hug. She pulled back, and said, "Lala, you have the most beautiful earrings! Let me fix your hair so everyone can see them!" She proceeded to tuck my hair behind my ears in such a loving, careful way, so that the world was able to see my earrings.

Tender. Loved.

Joy in our Journeys

There has been a concept rolling around my mind for a few weeks.

It hit me that a lot of times my attitude about doing some things is because I should, or it's just what I do. These habits and activities are sometimes rote, because I have been doing them for so long. The concept that has been rolling around because of this thought was:

How much more would it mean to me if I looked forward to/was excited about doing these things?

I have been thinking of this mostly in the context of spiritual habits, but I am sure it can extend beyond that. How much more would church  meetings mean to me if I were more excited about participating in some ordinances, like the sacrament? How much more would I get out of it if I truly looked forward to these experiences? I have been doing them for longer than I can remember, so how do I get more involved and personally invested? How do I look forward to  my morning and evening prayers? How can I make it so I jump out of bed (or roll out, some days) and the first thing I want to do is talk with my Heavenly Father through prayer?

There are a number of things I am trying to truly be excited about doing the 'little things'.

Having these thoughts in my mind has definitely helped. I am more conscious, more 'there' when it comes to the daily, weekly, regularly occurring habits. It comes to making a decision to be there and be able to take time to prepare myself.

I know I am not very good at just being. I don't take time to think, meditate, to prepare myself spiritually. My mind wanders all sorts of directions and I don't feel skilled in guided mindfulness. I know that is something I want to work on, a skill to develop to help with this excitement of my own spirituality, That is what it really comes down to-there is a huge difference between religiosity and spirituality.

Sometimes doing things we know are right because it is what we do, and a mindless habit is the way we keep plugging along. BUT as we become more mindful of what it all means, WHY we do it, and the blessings we have seen in our lives by truly developing a personal relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, we can genuinely feel the strength of those habits, and truly feel excited about the person we are becoming through these experiences.

In other words, it really is about finding joy in the journey, and sometimes letting the journey BE the journey.

Personal Scriptural Connections

In Relief Society last Sunday, our teacher asked us a question about the personal connection we have felt and the blessings we have seen in our lives through scripture study.

My thoughts went to the miracles and epic events that I have read and learned about, and then my thoughts narrowed down the stories to the individuals in the scriptures. In my reading of the Book of Mormon right now, I have been looking for experiences of the people when they were blessed with strength beyond their own, or when the Savior blessed them with an increase of knowledge, help, assurance, peace. There were examples of dramatic occurrences, to be sure. However, what has stuck out to me more is how individual and personal many of these boosts of whatever was needed at the time have been. It may not have changed the outcome of battles or changed the history of the world, but it changed that person for the better.

Because of that question in class, I have remembered that as much as Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are involved in the major events (from parting the Red Sea, to feeding thousands on minimal amounts of food, to 2,000 young warriors being protected in battle), they are also involved in the seemingly insignificant moments and personal battles.

While our loving Heavenly Father doesn't micromanage our lives, he is aware of us, and wants to be a part of our lives. As much as we invite him into our lives, our decisions, our woes, he will be there and will bless us. He is as mindful of the one as he is of the billions.

Basically, I know that Heavenly Father is as interested in us as individuals, on a one-on-one basis as he is in the larger scale population. I am so grateful to know that as his daughter, he loves me, he wants me to include him in the processes, problems, and particulars of my life.

Thoughts on Starting College

My baby brother left for college last week. He called me the morning he left home, and through my unexpected tears, I tried to impart as much wisdom as I could give him while still enjoying the few moments we had to share at the time. I talked to him about trying to make friends with people, and to not judge, because you never know who will really be your best friends. I reminded him that I loved him, and that I was proud of him, and to never forget that. I let him know that if he had any problems with his RA to call me (this is the helicopter sister coming out in me, and knowing how things SHOULD be with an RA :P).

As we hung up the phone, I had other thoughts and so much more advice to give him. I began to write them down, and thus this blog post was born. Here is the advice that has been going around in my head and my heart the last few days. Some is more serious than others, but I feel that it is all important!

Get to know your professors and TAs

• Be humble enough to ask for help. They are there to help. When you put forth effort, it shows! Take their advice, and be teachable.
• While being teachable, you will also want to be confident in the things you know to be true. Don't feel like you have to change everything to impress them.
• Take advantage of office hours! They are there for a reason. Even if it is to quickly clarify something, use the campus resources available to you!

Make eye contact with people

• It seems like we have turned into a society of ear buds and ignoring others. As you are going around campus, make eye contact and smile at people in passing. You never know what your smile can mean to that person

Take some classes just for fun

• Some of my favorite classes were just for fun, just because, and I LOVED them! You don't know what one class can do to change your outlook on life, or the direction of your life
• You can meet people that you wouldn't normally meet because they aren't in your 'regular' classes. 

Take time to find yourself

• I think we all need to be doing this throughout our lives, but the start of college is a great way to really start to hone this skill. 
• It is a time of change-allow the change! We are scared to not be who we are comfortable being, but as we allow for the changes a little at a time, we get to know ourselves in a new way and can really like the improved person.
• It is a time of discovery. People don't know who you were before, and you may have been trying to fit into a mold or the expectations of others. Take the time to discover who you truly are as you strip away the titles and roles that you have lived up to until this point in life. Enjoy the journey of discovery.
• HOWEVER, it's also more than okay to keep parts of yourself. Embrace the things you love about yourself and magnify your awesomeness. Don't feel like you have to go crazy just because you have this new found freedom and opportunity to redefine yourself. 

Be open, but don't overexpose yourself

• This may sound a little sketchy, but I mean it in the most appropriate way possible!
• Be sure to let people in, and let them get to know you, BUT not everyone needs to know everything
• There are parts of yourself that are special and personal and even sacred. Not everyone has earned, or deserves to know the deepest parts of  you right off the bat. 
• There are some things I have shared with very few people in my life, and that is okay. I see it as a good indication of how close I am with someone, and how much we have grown together.

College is different from high school

• Duh. :D
• You are the one responsible for your own learning. Parents aren't there to remind you to do your homework every day. You need to have the discipline to set the time aside each day to work on school things.
• It will take more time out of class than you think. 
• Planners can really be your best friend as you schedule things out. That's the beauty of getting the syllabus at the start of a class! You know what to expect, due dates, everything for the semester.
• You have to become a self-studier. This is when learning to say "no" to all the fun college things will come in handy. All-nighters are not all they are cracked up to be, believe me.
• Tests are not only on things learned in class. Textbooks are like a separate session.

Celebrate the little things

• Sometimes, the little things REALLY need to be celebrated.
• Getting a double digit percentage on some tests really is a celebration
• Rocking a cleaning check-celebrate!
• Random holidays-celebrate! (One of my favorite years of college was the one that we celebrated random holidays with weirdly connected celebrations, like playing leapfrog and eating grasshopper cookies on leap day.)

There are always people in your corner

• There are more people than you realize cheering you on.
• We are only a phone call away
• We will pick up the phone
• You don't have to go through things alone.
• We may be a challenge at times, but we are also your biggest supporters and will go to the mat for you all the time
• We love you!

The Community Progression Model is a real thing

• All relationships and communities progress through different stages. We start off in a pseudo community, then we have chaos (where we start to see differences). We then have the option to be open or closed about these differences, which leads to a healthy or closed community.
• This is not a solid, one time occurrence.
• As you develop, you will go back and forth through this model. It is such a healthy thing to do.
• One of the things I say every year with my new students is "Celebrate Chaos!" It means you are getting to a deeper level of a relationship, and it is getting real! yay!

The cafeteria is a wonderland!

• There will come a day when everything looks like it has already seen it's heyday, but that just lends to the creative juices!
• Find new food combinations.
• Don't worry about people judging your edible experiments.
• Find new ways of eating food you love!

This last thought is the most personal and so important:

Develop true, one-on-one relationships with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ

• You may feel like you are alone at times, but our Heavenly Father is always there, as is Jesus Christ.
• They know how you feel.
• They will always listen.
• They can guide you.
• It is a time for you to truly develop a relationship with them. You need to be able to know for yourself what you mean to them. You need to ask questions through prayer and listen for answers. Answers will come in different ways and at times you may not expect, but I know the answers will come.
• Questioning is okay, but you also need to truly strive to get the answers you are seeking.
• Allow yourself to live up to the divinity that is within you. You have amazing potential that you cannot be scared of. As you develop a relationship with Jesus Christ, and with Heavenly Father, you will be able to see more of who you are meant to be, and you need to allow yourself to become more than you initially thought possible.

These are some of the thoughts that have been floating around in my head and my heart since that choked up conversation last week. Take it or leave it, but I hope it is used well!

Oh, My Joy is FULL!

My heart is full with the joy and excitement of the first General Women's Meeting of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

All women, ages 8 and up all over the world were invited to attend the meeting, or a broadcast of the meeting. Leaders from the General Auxiliaries of the Church, including the Primary, Young Women, and Relief Society, hosted the meeting.

As a woman in the Church, I was curious to see how the meeting would be able to address needs of women from the young age of 8 to the more mature years. I was excited to learn, to grow, to feel, to hear, to know the truths that were taught. I was filled with the Holy Ghost, as the meeting progressed with music, talks, and presentations.

I have always felt a connection with music. Although I am not the most musically inclined person, I appreciate music and feel so much more with music than I do with other mediums. The choir was made up of girls, young women, and women from many stakes in Utah. The songs they sang were filled with strength and the Spirit, with truth and testimony, with beauty and bravery. Along with the actual singing, I absolutely LOVED how many moms and daughters were singing together, and holding hands or touching in some way while they were performing. I have to admit, I missed my mom a bit more during those parts. I was overwhelmed by the messages of love, hope, and determination in the music.

The talks that were given were beautifully basic. We were taught simply to be covenant keeping women. We were instructed on how to use our hands and lives for good. We were shown the example of others, and our Savior, on how to become more, to become who we are meant to be, to become that perfect (complete) person our Heavenly Father knows we are, even if we don't see it yet. I loved how all 4 speakers were able to beautifully intertwine concepts and truths throughout the meeting, while still presenting ideas in new ways that provided me with 'aha moments'.

The presentations reminded me of the beautiful fact that we are a worldwide sisterhood. I thought of my beloved sisters in Bulgaria, my cherished sisters from my younger years, and my treasured sisters with whom I get to interact on a regular basis these days. We may speak different languages, we may find beauty in different things, we may have assorted goals in life, but as President Henry B. Eyring said, "We are more alike as Daughters of God than we are different." There is greatness in our diversity, and strength that comes as we find connections, and as we remember the wise words of Marjorie Pay Hinckley, "Oh, how we need each other!", we will find unity and strength, no matter where we are geographically, spiritually, or emotionally.

One of the blessings from this meeting were the thoughts and inspirations that came to my mind. Yes, the words that were sung, spoken, and presented were well thought out, lovely, and true, but the thoughts and inspirations that came TO me are precious invitations to act, do, and become. I look forward to the processes in my life that will help me become the woman I am on my way to becoming as I fulfill my potential more and more each day.

Oh, my joy is full!